Good Day People!

:] I have like... a million things to do but here I am posting an entry on LJ... *sigh.. 

Anyway... I'm so surprised to find out so many people are celebrating their birthday tomorrow hehe. Happy birthday to them! I'm also one of those people hehe Happy Bastille Day to all the Frenchs haha

So we're going to go to the beach after I come back from intern... drive about 4.5 hours to Savannah and pretty much pass out there until morning. Then we'll maybe do some paddle boarding and um.. swimming? And then watch dolphins and make sand castle at sunset hehe that's the plan.. then drive back on Sunday and get ready to go back to intern on Monday. *whew*

Oh! So.. I got this... uh... Body-kun and he's... uh... very distracting hahaha It's like those doll with articulations so you can move him however way you want in order to draw the right posture for whatever you're drawing. But so far... I haven't been drawing.. just been playing with him as a doll.. *sigh... what's up with that... I'm like almost 30... Okay well back to work, night people!

Feeling depress lately

I've been asking myself whether or not I made friends with the right people...
So I don't know about everyone else, but I know when it's my birthday I just wanted to spend some times with friends and family and relax. My friend decided I should play some games to earn my present. I get all these ridiculous clues and have to solve them just so I can get the present. I'm currently interning 10 hours a day for 5 days a week with three online classes that have their own homework and quizzes and she wants me to play a game with her. I explained to her how tired I am but it just got pushed to the side. I still get stupid clues. I don't get it... I feel like I'm just a form of entertainment to her. Last birthday was the same. I just want to quit. I want to ignore everything she's sending to me and just end our friendship. So far, I've seen nothing that she's done for me. But when I lash out at her I start feeling guilty, when I ignore her I feel guilty. Sometimes I wish I just don't have feelings at all and just use my brain more than my heart.
And for people who say "Oh, you can come to me and talk about anything you want. I'll listen. I don't mind at all. You can complain as much as you like." And then the minute I start complaining they just put on the face like they don't wanna hear it. Or they'll just go somewhere else and ignore me. Thanks.. thanks a lot. I'd rather you tell me you don't wanna hear any of it. That's what blogging is for. Ugh. I feel like shit today.

I Would Say Something Like It's Been a Long Time LJ

... But if I start with that, it's going to be the same heading for every entry from now on...
I'm not good with updating and because I have friends who I can just tell them about my day, it feels redundant... However, this whole journal thing is supposed to be for myself so I can remember and reminisce the past now matter how shitty it is.. haha
Okay let's see what's new...
First of all Guess my last entry was sometimes in February? So I'm done with the Venipuncture intern, finished my spring semester, and now onto my summer semester... Currently interning at the hospital for blood banking and I really really like it here... now if I could get a job here it would be great! Before that I was interning at Microbiology lab and although I like microbiology, I didn't like the internship there. I didn't get to learn much and I didn't get to do many hands on activities. Some people there are a bit difficult to talk to, and because everyone was busy and they were short staffed I was pretty much toss aside...
However, here in blood bank, even if they're busy, everyday I get an assignment. And figuring out antibody is a headache but I feel like it's kinda like sudoku... The hard level. It makes you think like crazy but it's also fun and rewarding when it's solved. :]
I also have this friend who I've been helping out for over a year now. She told me that she would in turn help me with something. But now that I'm done helping her and finally finished what she needed me to help her with, she just backed out on helping me with my problem. I feel betrayed. But I feel like it's my fault because I trust people too easily and I think of them as my friends. Why would friends do that to each other? That's why I never doubted her. It's stupidly annoying how many people have betrayed me these days. I feel like it's better to just have superficial friends and no expectation. I tell myself that... but watch... I'll make the same mistake over and over again... because that's how easily I get over my mistakes and make another one. ugh my life.
Anyway, I should be doing my homework right now and I'm updating LJ hahaha bye. see you guy again whenever I think about updating
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